a new theory
Love makes you weak. Love makes you entirely vulnerable in a way that is entirely contrary to everything that I feel. At least that is how love is portrayed in the movies. If that is love than I want nothing to do with it. I will live with my cat, drink chai at four in the afternoon with raspberry scones and dainty tea sets, travel to remote unknown places, and escape through my books until people can truthfully say that I am an old maid.Shouldn't love build you up? Shouldn't you be stronger together? Why does that strength only come through irreversibly surrendering yourself to someone else? Why must there be so much vulnerability? I can see that openness in necessary for a relationship to succeed. I refuse. I don't even want to think about it. (yet I do) it is not that I fear commitment. Nope, this is about rejection.
Have you ever heard someone complain, "if they would only take the time to get to know me..." or "if only someone could understand me"? That is what I fear the most, that somebody would get it, that they would know me, that they would understand...and then they would walk away.
I hate sappy movies. At least for today. blah, what a waste of time I should have been reading.
posted by Trisha @ 7:44 PM
