The pendulum swings
I want it. I need it. I can't live without it.It hurts me. It heals me. I feel invincible.
I look at my life and I see endless choices and decisions. I see people watching me for whatever reason. God has blessed me and kept me and my choices have always made them proud. But what if, I climbed down off this pedestal for just a moment and made the mistake of my life.
Would they still love me: unconditionally. Would they forgive me: without reservation. Would they support me: anything that is within their means and then some. That is true love. But what of it?
I want something I cannot have.
Should I fight for it? That would be brave.
Should I die for it? That would be tragic.
Should I live for it? That would bring pain.
Should I lie for it? That would be easy.
Should I fall for it? That. Would. Work.
How was this plan born in my heart? Perfected in my dreams? and justified in my thoughts? I have fostered an idea so deceptive, I shudder. I hold it at arms length; but I cling to it.
Should I wait for it? That would be wise, painful, but worth it. right?
posted by Trisha @ 8:39 PM
